Your Questions Answered

Answer: All directives of the Qur’an and Hadith have common sense exceptions. The hadith which you have quoted pertains to a refusal by the wife without any genuine reason. If she is tired, ill or is not in the proper frame of mind, it is the husband who should adjust to the situation.

The Prophet (sws) has on a number of occasions instructed husbands as guardians of their wives to deal very affectionately with them. This is what he said in his hajj sermon:

 

Take good care of women, for they are in your trusts and have no control of their selves. You have only taken them as a trust from Allah, and you have been permitted by the words of Allah to have sexual relations with them. (Quoted from Ibn Hisham's Sirah)

 

 

Ascension of the Prophet (sws)

 

Question: It is stated that when the Prophet (sws) was flown to the skies from thebayt al-maqdas; he was shown some scenes which will take place on the Day of Judgement. Is this so? Because punishments for a lot of sins have been mentioned in the Ahadith which depict this event. As I understand, these punishments are to be administered on that Day; howcome the Prophet (sws) saw them?

Answer: According to the Qur'an, the incident of mi`raj (ascension) of the Prophet (sws) was not a physical journey. It was more of a spiritual journey and took place in a vision shown to him. The Qur’an says:

 

And the vision which We showed you [O Prophet!], We made it a trial for men. (17:60)

 

Dreams and visions, it should be borne in mind have remained a mode of revelation for the Prophets of Allah. Through them, they are imparted information by the Almighty in a symbolic form for the guidance of the Ummah.

In this particular vision, the Prophet (sws) was shown the various sections of Hell and the various forms of punishments being administered to its dwellers. These sights of Hell are enshrouded in the veil of symbolism and must not be taken literally. As such, the vision only symbolizes a future event.

 Of course! people will enter Heaven or Hell on the Day of Judgement after their deeds have been judged.

 

 

Women Visiting Graveyards

 

Questions: Are women allowed to go to the graveyard for the purpose of visiting their dead relatives. I have read in a hadith that women have been forbidden to go to the graveyard. Another thing I have heard many people say, though I have not read it anywhere, is that when women go to the graveyard the spirits of the dead tend to see them without their clothes. How true is this?

Answers: In the days of the Prophet (sws), women were initially stopped from visiting the graves because they used to vociferously wail and cry -- a practice which was rampant among women in Arabia at the advent of Islam. Once the women had learned to restrain themselves at such places, they were allowed to visit the graveyards. This directive, it must be understood, is not part of the Shari`ah. It was a directive given by the Prophet (sws) to deal with a particular situation and was withdrawn once the required end was achieved.

Women today can visit the graves of their dead relatives. They should try not to create a scene there. Of course! this does not mean that they cannot cry; it only means that they should not exceed the limit in this regard.

Spirits of the dead seeing women without their clothes has no basis.

 

 

The Significance of Visiting Graveyards

 

Question: How important is it to visit the graves of the dead? Does it make any difference to the dead ? Do they know we are there ? Or just praying for them at home will help them.

Answer: Visiting the graveyards has a very special significance: It reminds us of death -- the inescapable reality which every soul is bound to face. As such, we ourselves are the real beneficiaries of this visit. The Prophet (sws) has taught us to recite the following prayer when we visit the city of the dead:

 

Peace be on you O dwellers of the graves; we shall be among you when Allah wishes; we beg good for you and for our ownselves from the Almighty. (Muslim, Kitabu’l Jana’iz)

 

On another occasion, he spelled out the reason for visiting the graves:

 

This visit helps [us] in abstaining from worldly pleasures and in reminding [ourselves] of the Day of Judgement. (Ibn Majah, Kitabu’l Jana’iz)

 

The dead apparently do not know that we are at their graves. Their living part -- the spirit -- resides in Barzakh till the Day of Judgement.

 

 

The Dead and Barzakh

 

Question: Why is it required to say salam loudly to the dead when we enter the graveyard since the dead can not hear us? Also what about the reckoning in the graves if the spirits go to Barzakh after death?

Answer: Saying salam whether loudly or quietly does not mean that the dead are listening to this greeting. It is just a prayer from the living for the dead. We just imagine the dead person before our eyes and talk to him as if he were before us -- whereas he is actually not. This is our common practice whenever we deeply recall a dead person even while sitting at home, isn’t it?

It is evident from the Qur'an that once a person dies his spirit goes to a place beyond the barrier of Barzakh to a place whose details we know very little of:

 

Before them is a partition (Barzakh) until the Day of Judgement. (23:100)

 

Immediately after death, a soul comes to know whether he shall be among the dwellers of Heaven or of Hell. If he is to enter Heaven, he is treated in a grand style and shown his final residing place in Heaven. If he is to enter Hell, he is treated as criminals are before receiving their punishments and shown his dwelling place in Hell. This is a kind of a mental torture for him.

Both these treatments have been referred to in the Hadith literature as being given within the grave. Actually, in all such Ahadith, the word `grave’ signifies the world beyond the partition of Barzakh.

 

 

Grieving for the Dead

 

Question: Why is it forbidden to grieve for more than three days after the death of someone? Is it in the control of a person not to grieve?

Answer: It is certainly not forbidden to feel aggrieved for a dead person for more than three days. To grieve for a person is not in one's control. In fact, it is so natural that the Prophet (sws) himself wept the death of his son, Ibrahim:

 

When Ibrahim was about to die, the Prophet (sws), it is reported, picked him up, kissed him while tears were coming out of his eyes. One of his companions asked: O Prophet of Allah, do you cry also? The Prophet replied that this crying was a blessing and then while weeping remarked: Eyes shed tears and the heart is aggrieved but we shall only say that with which the Lord is pleased and we are sad at being separated from you O Ibrahim! (Bukhari, Kitabu’l Jana’iz)

 

The thing which is desirable is that a person should come back to his or her normal life routine by not later than three days. He should not just sit and sob after this period, but should try to adjust to the new situation and try to follow his general routine.

 

 

The Obligatory Rak`ats of the Prayer

 

Question: Which are the obligatory rak`ats and which are the optional ones in our five prayers?

Answer: The five prayers Fajr, Zuhr, `Asr, Maghrib and `Isha imposed on the Muslims consist of  two, four, four, three and four obligatoryrak`ats respectively. These rak`ats called fard rak`ats must be offered in all circumstances.

The Prophet (sws) offered some more rak`ats before and after these stipulated ones to set an example in worshipping Allah, and, as such, a believer should try to offer them as much as he can. However, all these rak`ats are optional. Offering them will certainly earn a believer a lot of reward from the Almighty, but not offering them will entail no penalty. These optional rak'ats are:

 

Fajr:two before the fard rak`ats

Zuhr: two or four before the fard rak`ats and two after

`Asr:two or four before the fard rak`ats

Maghrib:two after the fard rak`ats

`Isha:two or four before fard rak`ats and two after

 

 

The Punishment of `Sleeping Together’

 

Question: The punishment for fornication is stoning to death. But before this we need proof ie witnesses. Sometimes, it so happens that we know two people have been sleeping together but no one has actually seen them in this act. To my knowledge, the Islamic law requires that four witnesses must observe the two people doing this sin. So, in this age, should we disregard these witnesses (also there may be a case when there are no witnesses), and go for other measures for instance some medical tests that will prove that the two have had a sexual encounter?

Answer: First of all it must be understood that the punishment of fornication (zina), according to the Qur’an, is flogging the criminal with a hundred stripes, humiliating him and prohibiting his marriage with chaste women:

 

The man and the woman guilty of fornication, flog each of them with a hundred stripes and let not compassion move you in their case in the enforcement of the law of God, if you truly believe in Allah and the Last Day. And let a party of the believers witness their punishment. This man guilty of fornication may only marry a woman similarly guilty or an idolatoress and this woman guilty of fornication may only marry such a man or an idolator. The believers are forbidden such marriages. (24:2-3)

 

There are some forms of fornication in which a person compounds this crime by taking the law in his hands and spreading disorder and nuisance (rape is one example). In such cases, he can be administered severer punishments as mentioned in the Qur’an; he can even be put to death in an exemplary way (stoning to death is one form of such an exemplary punishment). The Qur’an says:

 

The punishments of those who wage war against Allah and His Prophet and strive to spread disorder in the land are to execute them in an exemplary way or to crucify them or to amputate their hands and feet from alternate sides or to banish them from the land. Such is their disgrace in this world, and in the Hereafter theirs will be an awful doom save those who repent before you  overpower them; you should know that Allah is Oft-Forgiving, Ever Merciful. (5:33-34)

 

The Qur’an has in no way bound us to adopt a particular method to prove a crime; a crime stands proven in Islamic law just as it stands proven in accordance with the universally accepted legal methods endorsed by sense and reason. Consequently, if circumstantial evidence, medical check ups, post mortem reports, finger prints, testimony of witnesses, confession of criminals, oaths or any other method is applied to ascertain a crime, it is perfectly acceptable to the Islamic law.

However, there are two exceptions to this general principle:

i) If a person accuses a chaste and righteous man or woman having a sound moral reputation of fornication, then the Qur’an insists that the accuser shall have to produce four eye witnesses:

 

Those who accuse honourable women and bring not four witnesses as an evidence [for their accusation], inflict eighty stripes upon them, and never accept their testimony in future. They indeed are transgressors. But those who repent and mend their ways, Allah is Oft-Forgiving and Most-Merciful. (24:4)

 

Circumstantial evidence or medical reports in this case are of no importance. If a person is of a lewd character, such things are of importance, but if he has a morally sound reputation, Islam wants that even if he has faltered, his crime should be concealed and he should not be disgraced in the society.

ii) To purge an Islamic state of prostitutes, who in spite of being Muslims, do not give up their life of sin, the only thing required, according to the Qur’an, is that four witnesses should be called forth who are in a position to testify that they are prostitutes:

 

And upon those of your women who habitually commit fornication, call in four people among yourselves to testify over them; if they testify [to their ill-ways], confine them to their homes till death overtakes them or God finds another way for them. And the man and woman among you who commit fornication, punish them. If they repent and mend their ways, leave them alone. For God is Oft-Forgiving and most Merciful. (4:15-16)

 

Another point to be noted is that the Almighty does not like that a criminal confess his crime himself or that those who are aware of his crime report this matter to the authorities. This is evident from the wording of the law of wrongly accusing someone of fornication stated in the Qur'an in 24:4 (See above).

The Prophet (sws)also is said to have said:

 

He among you who gets involved in such filth should hide behind the veil stretched out for him by Allah, but if he unfolds the veil, we shall implement the law of Allah upon him. (Mu'atta, Kitabu’l Hudud)

 

Similarly, he once told a person:

 

If you had hidden the crime of this [person], it would have been better for you. (Mu'atta, Kitabu’l Hudud)

 

 

Dealing with Beggars

 

Question: Should one give money to beggars? Some of my friends insist that money should not be given to these so called needy beggars in our society. My question is: How are we to decide who is needy and who is not? In some cases it may be evident but in others it is not. What is the right thing to do?

Answer: Professional beggars have become a real nuisance in our societies. More so because they obstruct money from going to deserved individuals.

There is no ruling found in this regard in the Shari`ah. It is a person's on the spot decision about giving to a beggar which sometimes may be right and at other times wrong. It is certainly very difficult to judge a beggar in such a short period of time.

A person should, however, keep in mind two things in this regard:

i) Even if a person is mistaken in his judgement and he gives some money to a beggar who is not deserving, his reward is secure with Allah.

ii) If a person must refuse a beggar, he must not scold him; the refusal should be polite.

 

 

Women outnumbering Men in Hell !

 

Question: There are Ahadith which apparently say that there will be more women in Hell than men:

 

Abu Sa`id Khudri reported: Allah’s Messenger (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) went out to the place of worship (outside the city) on the day of ‘I^du’l adhha or Fitr and he passed by the women and said to them: O Women, give charity for I have been shown the majority amongst you as the inmates of Hell. They said: Allah’s Messenger, wherefore? He said: It is because you curse one another very much and show ungratefulness to your husbands.

 

I do no understand this. Please explain?

Answer: In my opinion, this inference is incorrect and has arisen by not properly appreciating a particular style of communication used in certain Ahadith which depict dreams of the Prophet (sws). Such dreams are a source of revelation for the Prophets of Allah and in them they are shown certain images by the Almighty for the purpose of educating Muslim men and women. As a principle, all such dreams are not to be interpreted literally; they contain realities which are depicted in  symbolic form.

Symbolic representation is a very subtle and powerful way of expression: Facts seem veiled yet for him who pauses to ponder they are the most evident. They move a person in the manner poetry does. They ignite in a person the spark to look behind the apparent. They urge him to reflect and to meditate and then to discover and to infer. They educate him without rousing his prejudices. The Prophets of Allah (sws) have effectively employed this technique of communication. The words and discourses of the Prophets David (sws) and Jesus (sws) for example are full of powerful parables and subtle symbolism. The dream of the Prophet David (sws) and the way he interpreted it is mentioned in the Qur’an also.

The Ahadith which depict more women in Hell should also be interpreted keeping in view this basic principle. These Ahadith do not delineate the population of women in Hell since this would be a literal interpretation; on the contrary, they just caution them that there are certain deeds which they do a lot and which, therefore, are more instrumental in taking them to Hell; so they should avoid them. In other words, the symbolism is causative in nature. The cause has been symbolized to warn women of something which they often do.

 

 

Where is the Oldest Qur’an?

 

Question: What is the oldest written record of the Qur’an? How old is it? Do we have a complete written parchment/ paper/ anything Qur’an from the time of Uthman (rta) or the Prophet Muhammad (sws)?

Answer: The first manuscript of the Qur'an compiled by the Prophet (sws) was copied and recopied by thousands of his companions in his time and this process is going on ever since with millions and millions of copies coming into existence. Once a large number of its copies had been made and circulated among the Muslims, the original Qur'an compiled by the Prophet(sws) was wisely destroyed by Marwan Ibn Hakam the Umayyid Caliph lest it should become a source of trial and commotion for the Ummah. He had ordered Abdullah Ibn `Umar (rta) to recover it from Hafsah (rta) the Prophet's wife with whom it remained after the Prophet's death. It was brought to his court, where it was torn apart by him since it was not needed any more.

The countless copies of the original Qur'an which today lie with the Ummah are the copies of the original Qur'an as is testified by the consensus of the Ummah in every subsequent period of time. Nothing can be said with certainty about the oldest surviving copy of  the Qur'an -- and in the light of the above mentioned facts, perhaps discussion on this topic would only be an academic exercise.

 

 

Iddat

 

Question: What is the logic behind ordering a woman to stay in her house for a certain period after the death of the husband ?

Answer: According to the Qur'an, a widow should not remarry for four months and ten days after her husband's death:

 

If any of you die and leave widows behind, they should restrain themselves for a period of four months and ten days. When they have fulfilled their term, there is no blame on you about whatever they decide about themselves according to the [general] custom [of the society]. (2:234)

 

There are two basic objectives for this waiting period (iddat) for the widow:

1) To ascertain whether she is pregnant or not. If she is, this waiting period extends to the birth of the child.

2) To provide her with some time to mourn for her husband.

During this time neither should the relatives of the husband trouble her nor should she look for a new spouse.

Staying at home during iddat is no directive of the Shari`ah, as is generally understood.

However, a widow, during this period, should not go about doing things which are against its objectives stated above. The mourning period has its own sanctity and a widow should observe this period with solemnity and austerity. If she is pregnant, she should be careful in her life style lest someone may try to cast aspersions on the lineage of the child she is carrying. Keeping these objectives in consideration, she can lead her life in any way she wants.

 

 

Masturbation

 

Question: How is the act of masturbation seen in Islam. Is it a sin? If it is, then what is the punishment for it ?

Answer: There is no explicit directive of the Shari%`ah which forbids masturbation. In other words, it is silent on this issue. Consequently, it cannot be regarded as a sin. The verses from which its prohibition is usually derived, I am afraid, have another meaning.

The opinions of some of the companions of the Prophets reproduced below from Ibn Hazam’s al-Muhalla (Vol:11, pp. 393-4) indicate that they did not forbid it:

 

Ibn `Abbas:i) Marrying a slave girl is better than it, and it is better than fornication (zina).

ii) It is nothing but rubbing one’s private parts until a fluid comes out.

 

Ibn `Umar:i) A person who does makes a fool of himself.

ii) It is merely rubbing an organ.

 

Jabir Ibn Zayd:It is your water; you can discharge it [if you want].

 

 

Hasan Basri:There is no harm in it.

At best, masturbation can be termed as an undesirable act similar in nature to the emotions of anger and hate. Such emotions are generally against good conduct, and a person should try to control them as much as possible. However, there may be situations when they may play a somewhat positive role -- especially when they save you from a sin.